Gone
by SLTheOneAndAwesome
Summary: *TS3 spoilers!* A oneshot of Woody's feelings as Andy grows up and the loss of Bo.


**A/N. Hello one and all and welcome to my very first Toy Story fic. Yeah, so please excuse and suckiness or out of character bits.**

**I watched Toy Story 3 and I have to say, I loved the movie except for one thing. Bo's only being mentioned once in passing. Uh, what happened here? Isn't this Bo Peep, the first female character even introduced to the series and Woody's canon love interest? So why'd she get put on a bus.**

**Until I realized, Woody's probably repressing his feelings about her. Which would make mentioning Bo very taboo, and explain why naive ol' Rex was the one who brought up Bo. And repression leads to lots of inner turmoil and, anyone who has read my fanfic _To Hell And Back_ (shameless advertisement ^^) would be very aware that I find that to be the most fun to write.**

**Anyways, Toy Story is not mine. It belongs to the awesomeness that is Pixar. Otherwise we'd have gotten to see Wheezy's pimp side.**

It was dark. It was always dark now. It had been so long since he had seen more than a crack of light. Since he'd been held, or loved or acknowledged.

But that was what happened when a kid grew up. They out _grew_ things. They out grew things like the park, like rides, like games. They out grew things like hugs, babysitters, playing. But most of all, they out grew things like _him._

They outgrew their toys.

He'd been afraid of it. Afraid for so long. But he had to put on a façade for his friends, pretend that he had been well aware of the hurt he was suffering and able to put it aside for their good. But in all honesty, it hurt more than anything. How could a kid just decide to put _him_, his best friend, the witness of his happiest and saddest moments, the bearer of all of his secrets, aside like he no longer had meaning? Was that the fate of all toys? To feel like a child's everything, only to be tossed aside and to realize you were really nothing but plastic and fabric designed to amuse his undeveloped mind?

He'd always told himself that as long as his friends were alongside him, he wouldn't care, that they could make each other strong enough to accept their fate as aging toys. And yet, he looked around the toy box where he and the rest of his owner's toys were housed and couldn't see them in the dark. He couldn't feel their support. He couldn't hear their words of comfort.

Not while Andy was around. Not when he could hear his kid's voice, hear him with friends or his mother or his sister and know that Andy was there. They couldn't comfort him when it mattered most. And that only made him realize how insignificant he had become for Andy.

As toys, they could not speak when anyone was in the room. That was the first rule of being a toy, behind no moving when people can see you, of course. Andy would be speaking, and he, along with the rest of the toys, would be brought back to their games together when Andy was a child and he would realize more and more how much he missed his owner. But no one could give him comforting words. No one could try to convince him that Andy would be back to play with them. He would rarely get an assuring hand on his shoulder from another toy, but when he did, he hardly noticed as he was sucked into the memories that Andy's voice would awaken in him.

It grew harder each and every day to keep this show going for his friends. Poor Jessie had already suffered this once. She had warned him how much it hurt, but he had refused to believe her. Worse, he had invited her to become Andy's toy, allowed her to relive the best days, only to have to relive the hurt of being ignored for years too. And then there were the toys like Rex, who were _so_ sure they would be played with if they waited for the day that Andy would remember them.

But it was too late now. Andy was much too old to be playing with any of them. But he kept the other toys' hopes up, promising them that since Andy hadn't ridded himself of them, that he must still want them. But who was he kidding? That didn't mean he wanted them to play with. It meant he wanted them for nothing more than nostalgic reasons. Andy wouldn't go near them for years, not until he had his own kids who he could share his old toys with.

But were he and his friends really willing to hold on that long? Would Andy hold onto them until then? Another kid, one from a long time ago had done that with him once, passing him onto Andy. But it had been so long ago, he had forgotten about the hurt and the abandonment of the years in between. It was tearing him apart to suffer them again. To have to pray that he and his friends would be equally as lucky and hopefully see the day when they were freed from the toy box to play with the next generation.

So many toys were gone now. As Andy grew older, he realized which toys he no longer wanted in his life, and decided to throw them out, or sell them or donate them. He sighed as he reminisced on the toys that had gone from Andy's room. Which of his friends would be next to suffer that fate?

And what of the toys in Andy's sister's room? Ever since Molly had moved into her own room, Andy's toys had a very limited span of time they could communicate with Molly's toys. All of her stuffed animals, her dolls, and figurines. They had once shared Andy's room with his toys, but now there was the hallway between them, enough of a distance to keep the closest of toys apart. Like him and Bo.

Andy help him if he didn't miss Bo like an amputee must miss their limb. He had grown so close with her, confessed so much with her and it killed him to not be able to see her daily. The hurt only grew as he saw Buzz with Jessie. The space ranger toy was so obviously in love with her and she was obviously so ready to accept him. And yet, Buzz didn't seem to realize it. Couldn't he see that they had so little time left together? That any day Jessie could be snatched up from him and gone?

To him, it felt like the two knew they had a long time to decide on when to admit how they felt and that they could spend their days in the toy box flirting like teenagers. He had to wait for prime opportunities just to _see_ Bo Peep, and the two of them had each other whenever they needed each other. It just wasn't _fair_ to him.

It wasn't only them. The married Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head were just as bad. Married, together 'til death do they part. He loved Bo just as much as the Mr. loved his wife, and yet they could spend the rest of their days in the toy box together. They were even a set, so if Andy ever did choose to give them up, they would more than likely be sold or donated together.

But no one would ever think he belonged with the beautiful porcelain figurine and her sheep on the lamp. Not an old cowboy like him.

"Hey, Woody. Did you hear?" an arm shook him suddenly.

"What?" he asked, confused as he was snapped out of his thoughts.

"The family's about to leave for some outing. Mom, Andy and Molly." The other toy, the purple, green and white suited space ranger, Buzz, pointed out.

Woody caught his drift very quickly. With all three gone, that meant that they could commute between Andy and Molly's rooms until the family came back. It meant he could go visit Molly's toys.

It meant it was a chance to see Bo.

Woody gave his friend a grateful smile, "Thanks Buzz."

The space ranger quickly returned the smile before crawling through the box over to Jessie and trying to start a conversation with her without sputtering shyly. It did not seem he was succeeding. Woody rolled his eyes, glad that no one could see the rude gesture in the dark, before opening the toy box a crack to watch Andy as he got ready to leave.

Andy had grown so much. Woody sighed as he realized that Andy had easily grown a good couple inches since he had last bothered peering out of the toy box to see him. His face had sharpened to enhance a more mature face. His hair was much longer, something that the toys could hear Andy's mother constantly complaining about. Woody had to admit, he could not imagine himself playing with _this_ boy. He was so much different than the Andy that he had played with all of those years ago.

Andy turned in the direction of the toy box and for a moment Woody could have sworn that he was thinking about the toys inside the box. Did Andy also miss the days they had played together? Did he want them as badly as they wanted him? The boy made his way to the toy box and slipped his fingers beneath the lid, right near where Woody had been holding the box up. The toy felt a spark of hope as Andy's pinky finger brushed against his hand and the boy opened the box a crack.

But the moment was ruined as Andy's mother called from down the stairs, causing Andy to quickly drop the lid and run down the stairs. Woody quickly caught the lid and watched as Andy left. The moment the door was closed and the toys were sure their owner was gone, they tossed open the lid of the toy box, readying for any chance to escape their prison.

"Boy howdy does it feel good to get out of that darn box!" a red headed, green eyed cowgirl exclaimed as she jumped out of the box, holding on tightly to her red cowboy hat to keep it on her head. Jessie beamed a smile up at everyone who was peering out of the box, assuring them the coast was clear.

"You can say that again!" Mr. Potato Head mumbled in his usual snarky tone as he helped his wife out of the box. "I hate every second we have to spend in that-"

He was quickly interrupted as three alien toys rushed over to him to exclaim, "You have saved our lives! We are eternally grateful!"

"I've realized! Is that the only thing you can say?" the plastic spud demanded.

"Daaaaaaaddy." They responded, only to receive a sigh from Mr. Potato Head, who had only agreed to adopt them to please his wife.

Woody couldn't help but smile. Apparently Potato Head had saved the three from falling out of the Pizza Planet truck they had driven to save him, Jessie and Bullseye, when he had been stolen by a toy fanatic years ago. Ever since they had worshiped their "father". In fact, Woody couldn't think of anything they ever said other than the two phrases they had already spewed right then.

As Woody watched the little green aliens interact with their "parents" he began to wonder about adopting a toy with Bo, since toys couldn't have kids. Well except for those weird dog plush sets with the Velcro compartment for a few other smaller puppy plushes to hide inside.

In fact, Molly had one of those. Actually, now that memory was serving him correctly, Slink had fancied her for a bit. Until he had found out about the pups. He was already responsible for Buster, Andy's dog, since he was one of few toys who could understand him. Many pee stains on the floor had been averted thanks to Slinky. He was always reliable and Woody couldn't help but smile as he noticed Slink make his way over to the door and bark for the organic dog.

Woody stared at Buster in surprise as he came into the room. The dog was getting older, and it was starting to show. When Buster had been a puppy Woody had trained him to do many cheap tricks, along with some useful ones. The dog had also been wild as could be and would knock around all of Andy's toys whenever he burst in, trying to find Woody. Now as he entered the room he plopped down in front of Buster, communicating through grunts and groans rather than high pitched barks. Woody could only blink away his shock. Years ago it would have been impossible to imagine Buster so calm.

"Heya Woody!" Woody turned his attentions away from the dog to see Wheezy squeaking in beside him.

"Heya Pal. That squeaker still holding up?" Woody asked.

Wheezy gave Woody a smile so big that the plastic cylinder of his squeaker was visible in his bill. "Holding up longer than the old one, that's for sure!" Woody could only smile. While he and Wheezy hadn't been very close when Andy first got him, they had bonded after spending time on the shelf. Wheezy had nearly been garage saled because of a broken squeaker and Woody had risked his own hide to save him. Ever since, Wheezy had idolized Woody, but much more subtly than the Pizza Planet space men with Potato Head.

"But that's probably because Andy doesn't play with me much anymore…" Wheezy added quietly. Woody could only cough at the awkwardness the comment brought. Poor Wheezy. He had managed avoiding to be sold at a garage sale and even managed to find a brand new squeaker somewhere in Andy's mess of a room. Even then, Andy hadn't noticed him much and he was quickly cast off with most of Andy's other unfavourites. It was a miracle he hadn't been thrown in the garage sale box again.

Woody cleared his throat in an attempt to break the silence that had grown. "I'm heading over to Molly's room to see Bo Peep." Woody commented.

"Oh! I think I'll check up on my back up singers!" Wheezy chuckled. He and three of Molly's Barbies would usually do a concert when Molly still shared Andy's room. The four of them would usually hide away in a drawer a week before a show, planning some new routine in secret to surprise the rest of the toys. "I wonder if they still remember the "You've Got a Friend in Me" number." He commented as he started humming the song.

"First show you ever did." Woody noted as he nodded toward the door, signaling that he wanted to head to Molly's room.

Wheezy nodded as they made their way to the exit. "Heck of a show it was! You, Buzz and the gang had just come back from the airport with Jessie and Bullseye! And I finally got a new squeaker! It was definitely worth celebrating!"

"Yeah." Woody's imagination took over as he remembered that day. He hadn't wanted to come back to Andy's for fear of being outgrown. What would have happened if he hadn't told Buzz and the others that he wanted to come back and be saved from Al? Would it be better to watch kids behind glass with the Prospector, Jessie and Bullseye by his side? Or would he still know in his heart that the few years he'd have with Andy would be all the better because he would know to appreciate them?

He sighed, fully aware that he had made the right choice. His few years left playing with Andy would be better than no years spent playing with any of the kids in Japan. He let a small smile creep onto his face, glad to know he had picked well enough then.

"Well, I guess we split from here." Wheezy stated, shocking Woody from his thoughts. He looked around and quickly realized that they had made it to Molly's room while he'd been thinking. He looked at the bedside table and smiled up at Bo Peep, who stood there peacefully with her three-headed sheep by her side. Wheezy was turned to face a Barbie dollhouse, clearly expecting his backup singers to be in there.

"Yup." Woody didn't mean to let such a huge grin break out onto his face as he spoke. He was just so excited to get to talk to Bo that he couldn't contain it.

"I hope that smile's for seeing Bo and not getting rid of me." Wheezy commented.

"You know I'd never want to get rid of you. I got kidnapped by a toy loving nut for you!" Woody reminded the penguin squeeze toy as he made his way to the table, jumping up to reach the open drawer.

From there he swung up and used the drawer as a step to give him a boost up to the table top. No sooner had he managed to climb up and pull himself to his feet than he felt himself being pulled forward and he was pressed against the porcelain figure of Bo Peep. She removed her shepherd's crook from his neck with one hand and placed another against the cowboy's back. "I missed you Woody." She told him with her sweet voice. His smile gushed as he melted just hearing her voice.

"Aren't you going to tell me you missed me too?" Bo asked gently. She had a sly little smile on her face, very aware that Woody's silence was due to him being so glad to see her.

"You already know that I did." He answered. He leaned his head forward and pressed his forehead against hers, so happy to be close to her again. He breathed deeply, absorbing as much of her as he could, knowing that it might be a long time until they could see other again.

"C'mere you!" as per usual, Bo hooked her crook around Woody's neck and pulled him in against her, pressing her lips to his. Woody felt a rush of pleasant, wonderful warmth rush through him as he remembered how much he had loved when she tugged him toward her like that. The pain in his neck was always worth it, so long as Bo kissed him to make him forget the ache in his neck. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. He never wanted to let her go, and it saddened him to know he'd have to as soon as Andy and Molly returned home.

Bo pulled away from him, a lovey-dovey smile on her face as she beamed up at him, clearly expecting his own face to mimic her expression. Instead he had a solemn look which she responded to with confusion. He pressed her closer to him, so that their chests were pressed together as he bent his head down to murmur in her ear.

"Don't stop." He begged in a quiet whisper as he breathed into her ear. "I don't know when I'll get to kiss you again." He sighed and rested his forehead against her tiny shoulder, waiting for her response.

"You're only down the hall, not halfway across the world." Bo answered. But she dropped her crook, letting it clatter to the ground as she wrapped her arms around Woody's neck, gently stroking the back of his head with one hand,. and holding tightly onto him, with the other. She obviously didn't want to let him go as much as he didn't want to let go of her.

"But for how long?" his feelings about all of the toys who were already gone seemed to burst out of him, now that he knew he was with the one person who he could let himself be vulnerable with. Bo's sense could always calm him, it was one of the many things he had loved about her. He was so uptight and it was so easy for him to get hectic, but she always knew just what to say to make him realize he was worked up over nothing. Being so far away from her all the time, he couldn't help but feel like a ruptured dam as he confessed to her, "So many toys are gone now! How do I know Andy doesn't choose to get rid of Slinky, or Wheezy, or Buzz, or even me next? How can I know who'll be here today and gone tomorrow?" he shuddered as he gasped into her shoulder, desperate for her to comfort him.

He felt her head shake against his as she answered truthfully and painfully, "I really don't know Woody. I'm sure this uncertainty must be the hardest part of any toy's life. But that you think you have to take care of Andy's toys and make sure they aren't afraid, Woody, maybe it's too much." She sighed before she added, "You can't keep on pretending to know everything for them. You can let them know you're just as worried and uncertain as they are."

"But Bo, what if they can't handle it? I can't hurt them by telling them they'll never be played with again! There are so few of us as there is!" Woody could only imagine the sad, disappointed looks on the toys' faces if he told them that it was likely they'd be sold any day. The poor, disappointed face of a usual happy Rex managed to poke its way into his mind. Rex, who was so hopeful that Andy would want to play with them again. Woody couldn't even imagine telling him the truth.

"I'm not telling you to say that all hope is lost. I'm telling you to stop trying to protect them by encouraging the idea that Andy will play with them some time soon. They don't need to get their hopes up for something you know is impossible." Bo advised him.

Woody felt his eyebrows crinkle in confusion. That wasn't Bo's usual comfort. Woody pulled away from her and blinked down at the shepherdess like she was strange to him. That only made Woody feel more upset, knowing it wasn't something he could do. "That can't be it." he muttered.

"I'm trying to give you advice, Woody, not tell you what you want to hear." Bo answered, trying to persuade him that her words were right.

"Then why don't you tell me something I _need _to hear?" Woody demanded, desperate for Bo's usual warm comfort.

"I love you." She responded, reaching up to peck his cheek. Woody could only smile, glad to know that she was the same Bo who still knew just what to say.

Suddenly Buster started barking and Woody and Bo watched as he shot down the stairs, only to hear voices follow. The toys all froze at the sound of their owners' voices greeting the dog.

"Hurry!" Bo shoved Woody off of the table, trying to help him make his way to Andy's room. Instead he ducked into the open drawer and pushed his way back so he wouldn't be seen. He wanted to stay with Bo!

"Come on Molly, let's go through your things." Woody heard Andy's mother insist as her voice drew closer.

"But _Mo-om_!" the young girl protested as she stomped into her bedroom.

"I need to collect everything for the donation drive by four o'clock." Molly's mother explained. "It's three fifteen now. So hurry up." Woody peered out from his hiding spot in the drawer and saw Molly roll her eyes at her mother's back as the older woman started to leave.

Woody gulped fearfully. Toys could be donated. Which of Andy's toys would be leaving now that he wouldn't get to say good bye to? Who was it that he would never get to see again?

Seeing as Molly wasn't looking anywhere in his direction, Woody could watch her as she picked up things and threw them into a box set next to her. In went a pile of clothes she must have outgrown. A play set missing half of its pieces. Woody flinched for every stuffed animal she tossed into the box, knowing it was a toy who now had no home. Molly made her way around the room, throwing in old plastic jewelry and sunglasses. She reached into the Barbie doll house and began pulling out the Barbies. Woody's eyes widened as he had the horrifying thought that she would get rid of those dozens of Barbies that resided in that dollhouse. Instead she pulled the house apart until it could fit in the box. Relieved, Woody couldn't help but chuckle as he saw Wheezy with a Barbie's arms wrapped around him.

But the relief died as Molly grabbed Wheezy away from the Barbie and stared at the squeeze toy, probably wondering how it had gotten into her room. She shrugged and simply tossed Wheezy into the donation box.

Woody mouthed a silent "No!" as his eye caught Wheezy's. Woody had to grip tightly to the edge of the drawer to prevent himself from running across the room to pull Wheezy out of the box. It was the garage sale all those years ago, replaying in his mind. Except this time he couldn't take Wheezy's place. There was no way he could make it to the box without getting Molly's attention.

The girl continued scanning her room, pulling out a few more things to throw into the box. She set it on her bed and stared around the room to make sure that she had gotten rid of everything she wanted to donate.

Woody was already nervous as could be over the sheer amount of toys that Molly had thrown into that box. _Please let that be the last of it_. Wheezy was already gone. It was horrifying to imagine what toys _Andy_ would have gotten rid of. He didn't want to lose more than one close friend today.

Suddenly Molly's gaze dropped right on the bedside table and Woody hid inside the drawer. "Right, I almost forgot about you." She began fiddling with something on top of the desk. Woody remained quiet, staring at the top of the drawer, wishing he could see through it and know what was going on above him. Instead he just lay limply in the back of the drawer, waiting until Molly placed whatever she had grabbed into the box and left her room.

The moment he heard the door close Woody clambered out of the drawer and stared up at the top of the table. "Bo?" he called. He got no response. _No_. he thought, his eyes widening in horror at the thought that made its way into his mind. He climbed up on top of the table and gasped at what he saw. Or rather what he didn't see.

Bo Peep was gone. The lamp that she was a part of had been removed from Molly's desk and Bo Peep and her sheep were gone with it.

"No!" Woody was shaking and he felt his knees go weak. He couldn't support himself any longer and he fell off of the table and hit the ground hard. But he didn't feel the pain. He felt completely numb as he stared up at the ceiling of Molly's room. _Bo's gone_. He thought as shock settled in on him. Suddenly his pain intensified and he felt like every pad of his stuffing was burning,

"Woody?" a distant sounding voice called. Suddenly he saw the green and pink outfit of Molly's favourite Barbie. She bent over him and gently eased him up so he was sitting. He didn't resist, he felt too weak to do anything. "I saw you take that tumble, are you okay?" concern welled in Barbie's blue eyes. Woody tried to answer that he was fine, but his mouth wouldn't work. Instead he just stared at her and let her see the hurt that clouded his gaze.

"I think you need to head to Andy's room, before Molly finds you in here." Barbie suggested, turning away from the cowboy's pained face. She helped pull him up to his feet and walked him to the doorway. The hallway was clear, so she gently pushed him in, hoping instinct would take over and carry him to the comfort of Andy's room.

Woody, almost robotically, walked over to his owner's room and clambered into the toy box before Andy could come in. He sunk in among the collection of things in the box, not concerned with keeping his usual spot near the opening to watch Andy go about his business.

"Hey, where've you been?" Hammy insisted as he noticed Woody. "You missed a couple of troll dolls and army men go." He was giving Woody a look that clearly said that the cowboy should have been in Andy's room when their owner came around with the donation box.

"Aw, don't you mind him Woody." Slinky stated as he slunk his way over to Woody, clearly noticing that the cowboy was upset. "What's the matter?"

Woody didn't want to talk. He was aching all over from his fall and from losing Bo. He didn't want to have to explain what had happened. It was too much for him to simply _absorb,_ he didn't want to have to relive it to.

"Woody." Buzz pushed his way past everyone, knowing he was Woody's best friend and could comfort him better than any of the other toys. "What happened in Molly's room?"

"Wheezy's gone." A gasp or two erupted from some of the toys in the box, but Woody's closest friends knew that losing Wheezy alone couldn't have left him so distraught.

"Who else Woody?" Buzz asked gently, trying to coax the information out of his friend. Buzz turned to share a look at Slink and an understanding seemed to bubble between them. Buzz asked again, "Who else was donated from Molly's room?" Slinky's head hung sadly as he awaited his suspicions to be confirmed. There was one toy in Molly's room that meant to world to Woody, and everyone knew who it was.

Woody squinted his eyes shut and felt himself shake, not wanting to say anything. Why couldn't they just leave him alone? Buzz and Slinky had already figured out what had happened judging by the looks on their faces. So why did they need him to say it out loud?

"Woody-" he heard Jessie's voice and a gentle hand on his shoulder. Except he didn't want it to be Jessie's. He only wanted one other person with him, and she was gone for good now.

"Bo's gone!" he finally managed to cry out. "Bo's gone!" he repeated in a whimper and Jessie pulled him into a comforting hug. The cowgirl was being surprisingly collected as she tried comforting him. She rubbed his back as he cried into her chest, whispering that it would be alright in an attempt to stop his sobs. Instead it just made him miss Bo, wishing it was her he could cry to, rather than the cowgirl who may as well have been his sister.

He wanted Bo to yank him away from Jessie with her crook and give him a look, faking disappointment at him like she did whenever he got too close to Jessie for her liking. He wanted to watch that chastising look melt into a warm smile filled with understanding as she pulled him closer to her by that crook. He wanted one last chance to tell Bo that he loved her, more than anything else in his world. He would give anything for a chance to see her and be with her. Even Andy.

* * *

**A/N. Aw, now Woody's all depressed. I love it! :D**

**And I wasn't kidding when I said Wheezy's a pimp. Seriously. He has three Barbies who are his groupies! There were a few blank years where we didn't get to see what went on backstage, and it adds to the fun trying to figure out what happened!**


End file.
